Tue 21 Feb 2006
Naturally, as soon as I added all of my quotes, I got another one. I figured I’d add this separately.
Freshman, on learning about polders, dams, and dykes in the Netherlands: “So why do the dams have to be lesbians?”
Ladies and gentlemen, the future of America.
Thu 16 Feb 2006
I’ve been saying I’d post something. I didn’t. Well, now I finally am.
I’ve been teaching high schoolers since September. Since then, I’ve had a few quotes from my students that I’d like to share.
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Freshman: “Why do I need geography when I’m just gonna work at McDonald’s anyway?”
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Freshman A to Freshman B, after B had corrected my pronunciation of a town: “You don’t correct the teacher! He dun got his GED!”
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Freshman, upon filling out the Scantron to take the Geography midterm exam: “Mister, what class is this?”
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Freshman, on feminine issues: “Mr. Brent, I gotta change my pad!”
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Freshman, on being asked by another student to pull up her pants: “Why, I’ve got pretty pubic hair.”
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Senior, upon discovering I had issues of Men’s Fitness mixed in with the Newsweeks I brought into class: “Wow… I bet Mr. Brent’s a gentleman on the streets and a freak in the sheets.”
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Senior, responding to the opportunity of having a group work test: “So, when you wrote me up for cheating, that was really just cooperative learning.”
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Me, in a discussion of the executive branch: “Let’s talk about Dick and Bush for a minute.”
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Senior A, upon hearing that I had a female roommate in college: “Wait a second… They DO that?”
Senior B, to follow up: “Well I’m applying to CNU then.”
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Freshman, on discussing dividing Lancaster County into regions: “Merry Point is where the ghetto black people live, and Irvington is where the rich old white people live.”
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Me, upon discovering the significance of sick days: “Wait, so we can use those for mental health? Hot damn!”
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Fellow teacher, upon seeing two pictures of me on my desk: “Is that your twin brother?”
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I’m sure there will be many more to come, either as they happen, or as I remember them. There is so much said in my class on a daily basis, I can’t keep track of it.